What I wish I knew when I was younger

-Why you don’t need a lot of friends-

Let’s rewind to when I was a teenager>>>>>>>>> Being a teenager sucks but at the same time you’re having the time of your life because you can start hanging out, start driving, and you’re finally old enough to date lol. The downside to being a teenager is figuring out what friends are toxic and which ones are worth fighting for. If you’ve followed me for a while now you’ll know that MaryAnn has been my best friend since I was 12. As we got older we started to hang out with more girls. I started getting FOMO and upset with her for hanging out with other girls but I had no right to get jealous. I started dating Peter when I was 15 and MaryAnn was single. The problem with that was I wanted to date Peter and hang out with friends because I had major FOMO. Of course, Peter and I hung out with friends throughout the day but when our relationship got more serious we didn’t hang out with other people as much as we used to. I noticed MaryAnn was getting closer to other girls and getting invited to sleepover’s and I wasn’t invited. I started to question everything. Why wasn’t I invited? Why do I not have a lot of friends? What made it worse was when my parents asked me why I didn’t have a lot of friends like MaryAnn did. They weren’t being mean, they were just concerned. Let’s fast forward a little bit because over the years I didn’t know what to do, I was bitter, mean towards MaryAnn and just all-around a big baby. I started to realize after hanging out with other girls that I didn’t want to have a close friendship with them. I started to see that I didn’t want to put energy and my time into hanging out with them just because I had FOMO. I wanted to give my close friends all my time and energy. I started to learn that I’m not one of those girls that has a lot of close friends. I saw so many girls have 5 best friends and all they did was fight all the time, leave one of the girls out and hop from group to group. Most of those girls aren’t even friends anymore because they weren’t focusing on having close, meaningful, and loyal friendships.

-So for the girls that are like me and don’t want to have 50 best friends

I found out the hard way that I’m happy with only having two best friends (took me years to figure out). Also, I have to say that some girls love having a ton of best friends and that’s ok, but I’m not one of those girls. So if you’re like me stop having FOMO!! You won’t always be included in everything and guess what that’s ok! You’ll still feel left out sometimes but you have to move past that because the devil wants you to think you aren’t good enough and that they don’t want to hang out with you. FOCUS on being loyal to select people. Put your time and energy into meaningful friendships.

-What I’ve learned now that I’m 24

So fast forward to 24 years old and I have two best friends and a lot of friends but not 50 best friends. My sister Tina became my best friend when I got older because you know when you’re a teenager and you’re older sister finds you annoying (because you were annoying lol), and once you get older and mature you become a lot closer. Having a sister that’s you’re best friend is amazing because you know that you’ll always be there for each other. MaryAnn and I have a better friendship now because we know that no one can replace the other person.

-What to look for in someone to have a BOMB friendship

    -someone that doesn't make you feel like you're nothing 
    -someone loyal (loyalty is a BIG deal for me)
    -someone that lifts you up
    -someone thats willing to put effort into the friendship
    -someone you can be yourself with
    -someone that will be honest with you in a kind way 
   

But know this, that no friendship is perfect and you will go through hard times. If your friendship is becoming toxic figure out if it’s worth fighting or letting go. Pray about it and talk to your friend about what you’re going thorough.

I hope you liked this post! I wanted to write about something a little more personal and helpful. If you liked this type of blog post please let me know in the comments.

xoxo Sara

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